On the Day of the Great Victory, Black reunited with White.

Black lay still, unable to move. He was tired. He was weak.

Black had done his time and was ready to die, but seeing White’s face, he felt neither relief nor peace.

White crouched by the bed, holding Black’s cold hand and staring at his gaunt face.

White had remained pure as a dove soaring in the boundless sky, while Black… had done many things and seen too much.

Black wanted to tell White he was sorry. Sorry for how he had abandoned him. …

Photo by Sergio Capuzzimati on Unsplash

This article assumes prior knowledge of the seven stages of the evolutionary cycle.

To recap, a person goes through different stages in his evolutionary journey, represented by the diagram below.

Photo by Aditya Saxena on Unsplash

Once, in kindergarten, I was crying in the morning before school. My Dad, in his haste to stop my crying and get us ready on time, laughed and called me a crybaby. I felt bad for crying, and since then I believed that I had to be strong.

I bottled everything up inside, trying not to feel, and never expressed my emotions, which I perceived as weakness. Even if I was sad, I would just hide in my room, sulk, and tear lightly to myself.

When I was 18, a schoolmate told me I had a fake smile. I didn’t…

Image by S. Hermann and F. Richter on Pixabay

When I was growing up, my mum was everything to me, and she was a quintessential Tiger Mum.

She would sit down beside me and watch me do my homework every day when I came back from school, check my school bag and homework assignments, and watch me write every stroke of my penmanship. If my handwriting wasn’t perfect, she would erase everything and have me write everything all over again. Also, when it came to exam results, especially for Math, anything less than 100 was unacceptable.

She had a fiery hot temper, so I could never tell when she…

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What is love?

I have encountered two types of love.

Common love

The first type is what most people understand and experience as love, which is the type of love that fills the holes of the individuals involved. In the common type of love we look for people who can fill certain roles (and holes) in our lives. We evaluate relationship partners through the lens of what we need.

Depending on our early life influences, we find ourselves lacking certain types of emotional transactions. We can classify them broadly into two types.

People who lacked fatherly love. They look for people who…

Let us examine the evolutionary cycle, specifically, the internal journey one undergoes as he progresses along the path of spiritual evolution.

The cycle is pervasive and underpins all natural phenomena — day and night, birth and death, growth and decay. We also observe the cycle play out in human history: in the rise and fall of civilisations, and in the booms and busts of our economy.

To understand the evolutionary cycle, let us refer to the market cycle, since we’re all familiar with the ups and downs of the economy.

The market cycle

We will borrow Howard Mark’s description of the market cycle…

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For most of my life I‌ had built my personality around being hardworking, obedient, productive, useful, intelligent, and good.

After I‌ began my journey of personal evolution, I‌ directed these qualities to building a new life for myself. It took a tremendous amount of energy to change almost everything about myself. I had to transform from being a logical, quantitative, analytical person to become an allowing, emotional, empathetic person.

Instead of directing my energies outwards to the world of achievement, I directed my energies inwards to breaking down emotional blocks and breaking through my fears of rejection and judgment. It…

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I wish to make a distinction between the evolutionary path and the non-evolutionary path to provide some clarity for those who are seeking.

What is evolution

Evolution is the process through which internal change is achieved. Its outcome constitutes an irreversible change of a person’s fundamental life equations.

Some refer to this process as the personal evolutionary process, others term it spiritual evolution.

In biology, evolution is the change in heritable characteristics of biological populations over successive generations. With each life and death cycle, aided by genetic mutation, organisms and populations evolve to be better adapted to survive, compete, and reproduce. …

I have spent most of my life seeking love, and I believe many of us do too.

We give the search different names depending on our inclinations — finding a life partner, getting a PhD, climbing the corporate ladder, creating a family, and so on.

Whatever we do, we seek not just the goal itself, but also the emotional rewards of the goal. For example, we want a promotion because the promotion raises our position in the eyes of others and therefore makes us feel good about ourselves.

We all have our own strategies for how to get love.


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Ever feel like you’re wandering aimlessly through life?

Like you’re piece of driftwood floating on an endless sea, with no shore in sight.

Nothing seems to excite or inspire you.

Everything you do feels trite and boring. You live a humdrum existence, a life of “quiet desperation”.

Every day the same cycle repeats.

As the days pass, you just feel more and more lost.

At some level, we are all lost

Life is strange.

We were born and put on this earth, ostensibly through no choice of our own. Our parents decided they wanted a family and out we popped from the womb.

Then we were sent…

Shuying Ke

Shuying is a life and voice coach. She loves exploring life, seeking truth, and empowering people to reach their potential. Blogs at betterself.sg

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